FROM EBAY: "The scale-mail is made from polished steel scales and steel rings. It was painstakingly "woven" by me over several weeks in an effort to better prepare my guinea pig Lucky for the dangers of the modern world. The helmet was purchased at a Renaissance Faire later as it was the perfect finishing touch..."

Check out the story at Geekologie >

The story of teacher Carie Charlesworth got me to thinking. Carie married a man who became abusive. She divorced him, but he stalked and threatened her, going so far as to show up at the private school she worked at in El Cajon. The school, Holy Trinity, was locked-down and Martin Charlesworth was arrested and jailed. Marty will be roaming among us at the end of this month when he completes his latest sentence...free to terrorize his ex, their kids, and anyone else unlucky enough to cross his path. Adding insult to injury, Carie was fired from her job after the archdiocese decided that it was too risky to have her as an employee, and they had to put the well-being of their students above that of Carie Charlesworth. On the surface, it looks like the church was piling on, but the sad truth is....they made the only decision they could. It's not fair, but it is necessary, since sweet Marty has a violent record dating back to at least the 90's, and shows no sign of slowing down. Hey, you gotta be good at SOMEthing, right? Well, Martin is very, very good at beating the crap out of women.

But this isn't about Martin, as entertaining as he may be. It's about Carie, me, and other women who are victimized by people who are stronger and meaner than they are. Lets start with the word "victim." I hate that word passionately, because I was once attacked, and got to taste the victim experience first-hand. I don't recommend it, by the way...

As a "victim" of crime, I had to wrestle with some unpleasant truths; among them, the fact that I had to own MY culpability in what happened to me. Before you start freaking out...hear me out. When I was in my early 20's, I made a series of bad judgement calls that could have easily cost me my life. I got lucky, I was only sexually assaulted. That's a bad day, by the way, when rape is the BEST outcome of several available levels of harm. I survived the night, had a man arrested, went to court and endured more humiliation, and ultimately saw him pay dearly for what he had done. It took a while, but I eventually realized that the crushing guilt I felt afterward was there for a reason. My. Bad. Decisions. Had I made even one good choice that night, I could have gone my merry way, blissfully unassaulted, and unaware of just how effed up our legal system really is. But this is the story of what I did...and what I did that night was screw-up, royally. Do not misinterpret me, please...rape is wrong under every circumstance. But there is a BIG difference between Amber Dubois, raped and killed on her way to school....and La Dona Harvey, who invited a stranger in to her home, and was raped on her couch.

It makes me sick to think about it even now, more than a decade after the fact...but I pride myself on owning my mistakes, and I certainly learn from them. I know this is long, but bear with me. That Carie Charlesworth has been wronged is not in question. Abused by an Ex, and a legal system that lets him roam free to terrorize. But Carie Charlesworth also has to own the fact that she put herself in a position to be in danger, by marrying, and then staying with, a violent criminal. She put her own children in danger, and the lives of every kid at Holy Trinity are endangered every minute that Carie is in the building. It's an ugly thing, but it is the reality that the church had to deal with, and that Carie helped to create. Fair? No, it isn't. But as anyone who has been on the receiving end of crime can tell you, fair doesn't enter into it. Ever.

About the NSA....

It really cheeses me off that there are actually people who have the mindset that, "If you aren't doing anything wrong...you shouldn't worry about surveillance." Those people are idiots, and should not be allowed to procreate. At least not in America. I would recommend China, if you have that attitude.

The criminalization of the average guy has been slowly creeping forward for a while. Red light cameras...speed cameras...CCTV on the streets. All of these things add up to a government lying in wait for YOU to break a law. No matter how minor. The NSA has absolutely NO business looking at EVERY American's phone records. The basic premise that the government should be able to watch anything and everything it wants, is pervasive in DC...a place where people believe they are above you and me. And we have let them. That's on us, BUT, Edward Snowden has given up an opportunity to swat the government hand that is reaching into your cell phone. If you think it is OK for the government to access your phone calls, with absolutely NO justification, you get the government you deserve. The one that tells you what to eat, when to eat it; who you can talk to; what you can think; how you can vote; who you can associate with. You deserve Hugo Chavez and Castro.

If you are of the mindset that safety is more important that freedom...then you should let the government access your bank accounts, put CCTV on every corner, and check the GPS in your phone on a monthly basis, so they know you aren't going to bad neighborhoods and getting up to heathen mischief. I mean, hey, if you aren't doing anything wrong, you don't have anything to worry about...right?

There are few things more humbling than dealing with matters of health. Whether you are pooping yourself to death for a colonoscopy, laying in what seems like a thumping coffin in your drawers for an MRI, or trying to sleep with a Darth Vader mask attached to your face and wires coming out of your head, you are vulnerable, (mostly) naked and terribly, terribly human. Lets face it, it's awful, this maintenance stuff. Awful and necessary...especially as we get older.

It's easy to blow off those check-ups and tests, they suck. I've blown-off some health issues in recent years, because I was too busy. That's a lie. I just didn't feel like doing it. So some things piled-on. Nothing deadly, but serious enough to make me wonder what the Hell I was thinking, in not getting checked up. The exhaustion. The unexplained weight gain. The depression. I could have avoided most of my misery, if I had used my noggin, instead of shame spiraling and thinking it was me. There were answers, but I didn't want to know what they were. Well, now I do. So I'm climbing into that thumping coffin in my drawers today. Leaving my dignity, along with my pants and bra back in the dressing room. I have no doubt I will be fine, but I should have done this a year and a half ago. It would have saved me a lot of worry and misery. Now, I just feel stupid.

Gentlemen, bend over and cough...Ladies, get those heels in the stirrups. A few minutes of discomfort, is a damn good trade-off for years with your family. Healthy years. This could have bitten me in the butt. I got lucky, but I'm not counting on luck anymore. Neither should you.

I, don't even know...

Was this during San Diego Pride? 

Joe Graham, a pilot at the Wings Over Gillespie Air Show took LaDona for a flight in a North American SNJ-5 Texan from WWII!

LaDona and Joe flew the extent of San Diego - from the shores of La Jolla to the skys over El Cajon during their classic car show...

Be sure to check out the Wings Over Gillespie June 1, 2, 2013! BUY TICKETS HERE >